We don't really change....

While working in an aged care facility I was assisting a lovely, quiet ,well mannered, well dressed lady in her 80's. One day this lovely lady, let's call her Joyce, didn't want to take her lunch with the other residents in the facility. This was a change as Joyce, although quiet, liked eating with lunch with other residents. After asking a few relevant why not! questions Joyce opened up to say she was being bullied by the "popular " ladies as she hadn't worn her lipstick one day and they started picking on her for being... well lazy. So now Joyce wanted to eat her lunch alone in her room. I was stunned, honestly stunned that ladies of that age were picking on another resident for such a stupid reason, let alone picking on someone at all. I naively thought older people were beyond such silliness. I felt so sad for Joyce, she was immaculately dressed to me and my goodness if you can't relax in your 80's when can you!!! But it was also a huge lesson for me to learn, that people on a whole don't change, we carry our prejudices with us, our expectations and our personalities throughout life. That need for social interaction is necessary for a happy, healthy life and that it hurts the individual when it is taken away from them and that kindness is needed at all times when dealing with people, of any age, of any appearance. Also that quiet people especially need a little bit more of that one to one attention in order to make sure they are doing ok. Joyce did eventually go back to the lunch room with me and with the other staff we found a few kind ladies for Joyce to sit with. I don't know what became of the 'mean' older ladies but seeing Joyce back where she wanted to be and happily engaging really made my day.